About Me…
The sports world is shifting. Inviting a new way of thinking into the conversation. One that promotes the well-being of an athlete’s body and mind.
I say new, but Coach Phil Jackson did this decades ago with his teams. Incorporating yoga & mindfulness into his team practice sessions. A holistic approach to the game, as they say. And if you were to compare his team’s practice to others around the league? They all had similar skill, strategy, chalk talk, & weight training sessions. The “secret weapon” that put his team above the rest?
Mindfulness.
Fast forward to this new space in time where we are more willing to shine a light on mental health and have more open conversations as individuals, teams, organizations. It’s in this space that I am showing up every day, for myself and those around me.
As I sit down to think about what to write in this blog, it’s hitting me that you might not really know who I am & what I do in this space. So for this blog post?
I’m sharing my story.
With the hope that maybe one day we can work together to make this world a better place. So here it goes…
My name is Nikki Murphy and I’m a mindset coach for individuals, coaches, teams, & organizations.
Born & raised in Bel Air, MD, the middle of 3 kids, you could find me outside most days playing any sport the other kids in the neighborhood were playing that day.
In addition to sports, growing up I was a music, animal, beach, and stuffed animal loving kid. (I think it’s fair to say I still am all of these things.)
As for sports, I played soccer (center back), basketball (guard), & softball (center field) growing up and throughout high school. I had the honor of captaining those teams and received all-county honors for each, in addition to a first team all-state honor in soccer my senior year.
In college, I played soccer (center back). My sophomore year, I decided to try out for the lacrosse team (midfield) with my best friend from soccer. Neither of us had played before but ended up making the team & having a college career of it! I remember one game my teammate was looking to break her record for career points so I made it my mission to pass to her for a shot every chance I could. That game, she got the record & I tallied 7 assists (a school record at the time)! I also had the honor of captaining both the soccer & lacrosse teams my senior year.
One of my proudest accolades so far was being named to my college’s sports hall of fame with my 2000 soccer team.
That season we became the first team in school history (male or female) to play in the NCAA tournament. We ended up making it to the DIII Sweet Sixteen. The things we did that season were incredible. We believed in each other. Supported each other. And I have a special place in my heart for each and every one of these incredible humans. They taught me so much about being a good teammate. And how, when done right, working together in specific ways can make a good team, great. Similar to what Phil Jackson did with all of the team’s he coached.
In addition to being a part of that incredible honor, I’m also in my college’s sports hall of fame as an individual athlete in both soccer & lacrosse.
After college, I worked for an investment company. I did not find joy in that job lol. But, I did find a love of coaching people as I became a manager and department trainer. It was with the confidence gained through that experience that I took the love of coaching into sports. I left the investment company job, after having my son, & joined the sideline as a coach.
I coached a season of soccer at a local high school and then landed the women’s lacrosse head coaching job at Harford Community College where I coached for 10 years, 7 seasons. ( 2 covid seasons and I took a year sabbatical to live in England.)
Within those 7 seasons, the team tallied 5 National Championship Appearances, 2 National Championship seasons, & we were honored to have 21 All-Americans play for our team throughout the years.
I am also in Harford Community College’s sports hall of fame for coaching.
This season of my life produced so many incredible experiences, memories, relationships, life lessons, that I will forever be grateful to have had. One of those memorable experiences included the day I gave birth to my daughter. I remember my water breaking early Sunday morning. A game day. And being bummed that I wouldn’t be able to make the game against Nassau later that day.
I remember how the team was losing at halftime but channeled their inner strength and energy to pull out a win with an incredible second half performance on behalf of our newest member.
I remember two weeks later, the team traveling to Nationals without me. The way my coaching staff rallied around the team, the way the team rallied around each other, it was different. Powerful. Like magic. And one of many moments where I realized we had created something more here.
There was a certain power in this space of mindset/mindfulness that was beyond me as a coach.
I used to think the players needed to mold to me but the more I coached, the more I realized in order to have an enjoyable & successful season I needed to mold to them in a way.
After that season, I started playing around with my coaching style to see what we could do to incorporate more mindful/holistic practices to put us above the rest. We started doing things differently. Things like checking in with each other before every practice & 1x1’s throughout the season, getting to know our why & each other’s goals for the season, being curious about each other and learning about our different personality types, incorporating breath work, visualization, manifesting, & yoga.
I still held my core values & team culture close but decided to start asking more questions, getting to know each of my players, seeing them, meeting them where they were and pushing them to be better from there.
At first, I was just curious about this space but in those last 2 years of coaching at HCC, I dedicated it all to this idea of combining transaction and transformational coaching into our culture.
It was in this space that we started winning national championships.
2 to be exact. Back to back with COVID in between. Only 1 returning player on the roster. (Very proud of that stat!)
That’s when my players did things for me and for each other that, to this day, I can’t begin to explain. Things like scoring double digit goals, playing positions they’ve never played before and crushing it, having career high saves, coaching each other up, leaning on each other. And it was after my last season in 2022 that I looked back on my coaching experience and realized there is more to this. There’s magic here.
And so it’s become my mission to share it with the world. I put down my whistle, picked up my entrepreneur hat, & got to work creating a business of mindset coaching. It’s in this space where I have been able to connect with hundreds of players, coaches, teams, parents…to share this mindset work in the hopes that it would unlock potential for them like it has for me.
All while juggling life at home with my family.
My daughter is currently in 7th grade. My son is in 9th. Both are in their “sports era” and allows me the honor of coaching them or getting to be their parent on the other sideline.
My husband is obsessed with soccer, coaches my son’s team, is an ultra-runner with triathlons, 50ks, 100ks, & soon to be a half Ironman as a list of achievements. He listens to my crazy ideas and gives me space to try them. For that, I could not be more grateful.
Our dog is the best boy and loves us all just the way we are.
I want to be clear in saying I am not a licensed therapist. I do not have a degree in sports psychology. I looked it up and the cost of either at this point is just way too high. But I still feel in my heart that I can make a difference here. So here’s what I am:
I’m an athlete, a coach, a parent, who has a lot of experience in the sports world. I am obsessed with learning new ways of doing things. And I have a passion to help make this a better space for everyone in it.
I’ve done a lot of research, so much studying and experimenting, to come up with an effective way to help people understand what mindfulness is & how to incorporate into every day life (on and off the field), how the brain works & get to know our own alarms/stress responses/traumas to be better because of them, and learning techniques to use daily to strengthen the muscle of mindfulness.
I created the hive & bee logo to symbolize the importance of community.
To remember that just like bees, mindfulness can be scary and can even sting a little bit. It can be hard to face fears/uncomfortable feelings. But when we have the courage and community around us to help? There’s POWER in this space.
Working with me looks like 1x1 time with athletes, parents, & coaches, as well as team workshops and guest speaking opportunities to hear more about the power of mindfulness.
As I sit in my sessions today, I can see who’s ready for this work and who isn’t quite there yet. My hope in every session is that 1 player, 1 coach, 1 parent, will come with an open mind and an open heart. It’s those people that benefit the most. And it’s those people who spread the word like bees spread pollen from flower to flower to help them grow.
We are living in a community of flowers and have the incredible opportunity to be pollinators of our minds.
Kids. Adults. Humans. It’s that important.
I host a podcast with a friend of mine from college, Anthony Davis, to talk about this exact thing. We shine a light on youth sports and talk about what’s working as well as have real conversations about what’s not. I don’t do everything right. I make a lot of mistakes. This space allows me to be open and honest about what didn’t work with the hope that it will save a coach/parent/athlete down the road.
That’s the goal. To have the confidence to do things a little differently. To take a group of people, like Phil Jackson has done time and time again, and make them all a little better. That’s where you will find the competitive advantage. And my hope for you is that you will also find joy in this journey.
So? That’s who I am. That’s what I do. And if you want in? Reach out. Let’s see how we can work together to make a better community for our own mental health and the mental health of our kids, our community, our future.
